i thought i’d indulge you all and give you a glimpse into the day of a mom. well, at least my life as a mom. at 6:30 this morning i woke up sandwiched between a 4 1/2 year old and a 3 year old. i sleep in a fairly large bed yet somehow, all three of us are taking up only half. i’m sweating. my clothes are sticking to me. then i realize that i have been peed on. dammit. this sucks. “everyone out!!” i rip the sheets off of the bed while bitching about, “this is why no more little people are sleeping in my bed!” it’s my own fault, really. i should have made them go back in their bed. but at the time, it seemed like a better idea to just let them stay. wrong. i go down into the basement to wash my sheets and realized that i left towels in the washer the night before. great. now i have to rewash because they smell like wet ass in a hot car. rewash! it’s now time to take the clothes out of the dryer. i discover there is gum stuck to the inside of my dryer. perfect. i would like to send a kudos out to pampered chef for their small bench scraper. love it! it scraped the gum right off with no mess at all. however, i did hit my head on the rim as i was emerging from the dryer. dammit to hell.
we, well not me, they probably went through 3 or 4 pairs of undies today. something about my life and pee. i haven’t figured it out just yet. my kids enjoy playing so much that they’d rather pee themselves than go to the bathroom. they’re very cute and sweet, but they smell like a couple of homeless men. (no offense to any of the homeless men reading this.)
i was feeling so great today that i decided to clean my house top to bottom. the worse rooms are the bathrooms because well, aside from the obvious, there are so many tiny things that have to be taken off the counters and then put back, yadda yadda yadda. i have three bathrooms, so this job is tripled. i’ll tell you, there is nothing that makes a woman feel sexier than being on her hands and knees in front of the porcelain god elbow deep in doo doo water. okay, i wasn’t elbow deep, but the pee on the rim of it was certainly not mine. here we go with the pee again. bathrooms, check! i go down to the kitchen to see my son standing there with mud on his hands, feet and face. “i gotta go pee.” DAMN!!! wow. my day really does revolve around pee.
but alas, my friends. i tell you, it is a great night. i’m alone. the first time in weeks, just me in my clean house. i am going to shower and sing to the top of my lungs, maybe even dance a little, fix me a glass of wine, watch a most wonderful movie (quite possibly the best love story ever), and fold my clothes. life is wonderful. good night…
yes. it is indeed the most wonderful love story ever.
“I’ll give you the blue one. because you’re nice.” and so they won the game…
cap ou pas cap?
